What to do and what to say? Each day I try and come up with a worthwhile meaning to write about. Yet, it does not seem to come. The only thing that comes to mind is, the loneliness and despair. People keep saying, just write and the writing will help. Think positive thoughts, and the rest will fall in line.
I no longer want to think where I have been, but be able to write about where I am going. But that is the question, "Where am I going? And what is it I am to do with where I am at now? Just keep moving forward, and hopefully things will turn out right.
This was suppose to be a great adventure, but instead it has turned into a daily struggle to survive each passing day. One day is no different than the day before, as they seem to run together, as if there is no difference from the one before. Where the same problems crop up each day. Each day as I get on my hands and knees and ask God, "Why am I here, what is my purpose?
All I want to do is find a place called "home". There are a great many things to see and do, but getting there and enjoying them is another thing entirely. I am so far out of my depth, with no where to turn, but to God for the answers I seek. Trying to bring positive thoughts and people in my life, those I know and meet in real life and those I have never met before.
Those people who look forward to what I am going to write, and just what I might say to brighten their day, as I am hoping the same thing for me. I keep being told, "not to give up and things will get better". Will they? Time will tell.
God bless.
James Garland
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