What people do not understand

How could I do something so stupid but think at the time it was a good thing. To only end up where I am at now. I admit it, it was a dumb thing to do. To think if I went somewhere else, things would be good or different. They are not.

To be stuck out in the boonies with a three mile hill to walk up or down. Where people say, "just find a place closer to town". Yeah, right, with no money to do it. It is expensive to live here on the island of paradise. And that is what people think this place is. When everything is so far away and I have to hold tight with what little money I do have. In fact, I am not eating very much so that I don't have to spend any money.

Even if I wanted to leave here, there is nowhere to go. I am in limbo land. I sit here trying to figure out how to get myself out of this situation with no solutions in sight. In life not having enough money to survive or buy a ticket out of here and back to the mainland.

Then there is the problem of getting there to board a plane, then where shall I go? And who is going to pay for it, I sure don't have the money for it. There we go again back to not having any money. So you see I am right back where I started from, stuck.

Yes, I pray every day for God to help me find a way. That is what people say to, "pray".

I am living in a place where water for showers, washing dishes or doing the laundry comes from what is called a "Catchment' to be pumped up to the house out of a tank. Or where fresh water is stored in three gallon water bottles.

As some people would like to think that this is easy and that I can just change things or make them better in an instant, are not here. So I do the best I can explaining the situation and even then I have not shared all there is to share. But what else can I do but write and that's what I am doing.

I have no one I can call for help and all I can do is pray to God and hope you will too.

James Garland